Monday, August 30, 2004



Monday morning buzz started around 6am this morning. I'd thought of going straight to a meeting, from home, but then remembered that I'd forgotten to bring the folder back on Friday night. Decision would be to have to go into the office first this morning to retrieve that file for the meeting. And oh no! I'd thought that I dont have to do anything to my hair until like this morning when I washed it last night before going to sleep. Now, I would have to curl it, morning's just not a good time for setting any kinds of things to your hair ... I dont think I would have time and I can imagine my darling husband's voice going ...quick!quick!... losing patience. 7.30am -- my first call of the day came in. One of the staff is sick -- was my first thought. Either that or the office is on fire. Is the office insured? Must speak to Rozi about it -- my thoughts as I took the phone from my darling husband. It was Adam's babysitter. Guess what? They are still in Kuantan and guess what again ... scratch all the meetings for the day, I'm staying home.

Sent my darling husband to the LRT station at Wangsa Maju, Balqis then declared that she should be sent next before Adam. Balqis of course, must not know that Mommy is staying at home with Adam else all hell will break loose! I was contempleting of having both kids with me for the day since I was not going to work anyway. But then, I thought, I would need to sent out a few emails, replied some and work some on the laptop. I promised Balqis I'll come fetch her 'before night comes' because 'I not like you come get me when night comes'.

For the past two weeks, my schedule has been pathetically awful. I would only arrived at her school/day care between 7.30pm - 8.30pm. The poor darling. Of course my guilty feelings forced me to tell my husband 'Darling ... please step on it!' when all the other times, I would be the one that tells him to 'Can you please slow down a little bit? I would like to be there in one piece'. Well... good decisions are based on appropriate scenarios. There are certain times when we dont necessarily have to hurry. And there are certain times, like, my God.. you'd better be there in 5 minutes flat, kind of thing.

I wanted to look at cybertv to watch my friend Nisriwani, the author of 101 Puteri Dunia Melayu being interviewed by my friends Suhaimi Sulaiman & Tengku Elida, on the Power Breakfast Show. But of course, Adam dominates the laptop and the laptop turned off three times! Probably have to catch the reruns.

The handsome boy slept then woke up looking around for me but didnt want to be picked up. He stood with his back to the balcony door, not wanting to be touched. He came over to the workstation and I picked him up. He slept again on my shoulder - great achievement.

Everybody's been asking what we're gonna do tomorrow. Have not thought about it. Perhaps just lazing around at home ... Kuala Lumpur and its vicinity might be crowded.

Home, where love is.


signing off..Hazelinesnow at 2:44 PM [ | ]

{Takes all sorts to make the world .. the world..}



Thursday, August 26, 2004



I stayed at home today, taking care of darling Adam. Adam's babysitter is on leave. Tomorrow will be my darling Husband's turn to look after Adam and then I take over again, on Friday. We had fun playing the whole day - Where does he gets all those energy? I let him messed up all his toys watching closely how he chose each toy, observed it, threw it back to the container, dig on in the container, took out another toy, observe and threw it back ... His favorite mischief nowadays is switch-off-the-TV-when-Mommy-is-watching. He will always switched it off then looked back to see how I will react eventhough I think he knows that I will always be upset with him. He'll looked back closely, I believe, to see what this woman will say or do today. And, today might be different than yesterday. He has this never-mind-let's-do-it-again-and-see-whether-her-reaction-is-different-this-time attitude about it. Today, Adam made history. He is on Rhinathyol (Flu, Cough & Phelgm mixture), Leftose (Phlegm), Antibiotics and a strike against taking all kinds or forms of medication. Normally it'll take the two of us for the job. It's never a quiet affair. Taking medicine time is always very trying and tiring both for us and Adam. He will kick and fuss and yell and wriggle, clamping his mouth and yell and yell some more. Basically we put up with a lot of screams and a great big struggle. But today, as if he knows that his pint-sized Mom is all alone and this challenging chore is on her shoulders, he behaved, slightly. I still need to put him on the floor, lying down with both his hands under my legs. But, I shall announce that it is without a scene. He opens up his mouth and swallow -- one down, two down and three down! I was amazed beyond belief but with great big relief. I wonder what will happen tomorrow with my darling Husband.

Oh yeah .... My darling Husband will be at home taking care of Adam and I will be arranging for Balqis' school to sent her back home around 5.30pm or 6pm. I will be sitting in a 5pm meeting at the Client's Underwriter's office and I predict that the meeting will drag onto at least 7pm. I dont want Balqis to be late going home. I dont want her to be too tired. I hate late meetings because it means that I will be late meeting with my two babies after the whole day away from them. And for sure, tomorrow, when I arrive, I will not recognise my own house. There are times that I thought ... oh no ... I've gone mad... I've gone into someone else's home. All the mess that greet me were not there when I left home this morning ... this must not be my home.. I've made a terrible mistake of walking into somebody else's living room... get me out of here!!

Nevertheless, I will be home on Friday thus, I may be able to do some cleaning up -- yeah right -- I wish! I think sometimes, my thoughts betray me by thinking without looking back. Let's step back for awhile. Yes... I will wait for Siti, my maid to come in Saturday to help me clean up. I will not attempt to do the impossible.

Time to get back to my proposal -- I've just had a rush of inspiration. It's telling me to save it and present it tomorrow as it is. Nothing more to add. All angles, covered.

The big Baby of the house is reminding me that it's close to 2am and I should be in bed. (Actually -- I know.. He's saying that so that he could take over the laptop to play his online chess game that he is addicted to!)

Oh before I forget -- Balqis told me today in the car that her best friend, Chau Win scolded her. 'Chau Win scold me today you know. Next time you take the 'pisau' and cut her head ok, Mommy'. Where did you get that from? I never said that to you or even when I am so very upset with your Daddy (at least I believe that I never said it out loud, if that thought ever crossed my mind). It turned out to be either Amirul or Nicholas that said that so 'I follow only'. Both Amirul and Nicholas, the darling boys are 5 years old. Balqis will be 4 years old this October. Where do they get all these ideas from?

I shall need a much more serious therapy. I am hoping that one of my clients will agree to my strategy to do a Media Retreat where we bring a group of media people away from Kuala Lumpur, the destination in mind is Tanjung Rhu Resort and Spa in Langkawi. I'd put in spa treatment for all of them. And of course, I will include yours truly, who is in dire need of any kinds of spa treatment. If the client agrees to my sometimes far-off strategy, that is.

But for now, my strategy will be to go to sleep. Like, now .....





signing off..Hazelinesnow at 12:57 AM [ | ]

{Takes all sorts to make the world .. the world..}



Monday, August 23, 2004



Been ultra busy. Business is buzzing thus work triplicate itself. As I was finishing off with one fax on the last Friday very late afternoon, I received a call from Balqis's school. My assistant took the call which came in on my hand phone. Balqis is having fever! Flew on the Federal Highway to get my darling husband at his work and into the Friday early evening traffic, we inched into the crawl on almost all of the highways around Kuala Lumpur. But, of course, my darling husband seemed to be very cautious all of the sudden. He, who would normally not let a gap of a mosquito between the cars infront of him, were like a kancil away from the other car infront of him throughout the entire journey. On normal days, there will always be the sudden swinging in infront of whoever that was just a second late in inching and proceeding forward. But that evening, my darling husband seemed to be taking forever to get us to Balqis's school. I was praying hard and hitting the accelarator in my mind.

When we arrived, Balqis was really hot. To the clinic. 39.2. Voltran supp to the anus. Screamed at the nurse -- 'Pain, you know' and cried. She also had fallen down earlier that afternoon and had on her forehead a blue black round bump. Besides that, there is also a slight blue black mark on her cheek. Apparently, she'd fallen down face first! I cant imagine and I dont want to either.

Darling Adam had a bad flu over the weekend. He also ended up with a bad cough come Sunday, much to my dismay. Luckily, the strong boy was without fever. Today, his babysitter told me that he hardly coughed and his flu seemed to be getting a lot better too. I was just too relief beyond words.

It's the school holidays again which means that the morning traffic would be a little bit gentler to the motorists. Balqis noted that not very many of her friends were at school. She is there to join in the Holiday Camp program. I dont know and am not sure what is the plan this time but normally they have trips and outings besides the normal art and craft thingy that she does all the time, well, at least most of the Camp that she'd attended.

This morning, at work, I found a folded piece of paper in my handbag. I opened it up to see that Balqis had left her efforts last night, in my handbag. I asked her about it this evening to see whether she remembered putting it there. She did. She told me that she placed in Mommy's handbag so that Mommy can bring it to work. I told her that I showed it off to all the aunties at work. She beamed especially when I told her that all of Mommy's friends said that she is clever and beautiful! Wonder where she got the vain pot-ness from -- must be from my darling Husband's side of the genes.

Adam too now, will look into the mirrors without fail to just watch himself jump, smile, clap and wearing a cap. The darling boy is now asleep. He fell asleep in the car following his Daddy put in gas to the car. I hope he gets a good night sleep tonight. He didnt last night. He woke up twice throwing up from all the coughing. The poor baby.

Mommy has to go and check in on the two babies now. Wonder where the third and biggest baby is. Perhaps sleeping while putting the other two to sleep. I think I'd better rest too. Feel like flu is coming my way -- again! After this, when they are both grown up and out of college, I want to go to sleep at 8pm every night. But then again, perhaps, that will be just that not by preference but by age!

That reminds me - someone wrote in my birthday card once -- Age is mind over matter. If you dont mind, it doesnt matter. Or something like that.

Well, let's not mind. It's the journey ...









signing off..Hazelinesnow at 9:09 PM [ | ]

{Takes all sorts to make the world .. the world..}



Saturday, August 07, 2004



It is a strange feeling. The head is throbbing and seemed to be spinning.. or wait a minute is it the room that's spinning? My eyelids are glued together and am finding it hard to open even one lid. Heavy lid I have.. must remember to not put on too much eyeshadow next time .. and .. oh the sky high mascara is really making my eyelashes too heavy to be opened. And what's this? Oh no ... my throat hurts when I swallow. Flu is on the way. I need antibiotics. I need to not wake up until next week. I need to ... I need to ... I forgot what I need. Oh yeah ... I need to drink some water but can I not wake up and have that drink while I sleep?

I need my vicks inhaler. Where is that inhaler when I need it?! Is that Adam I hear crying? It sound so far away. Is that Balqis's scream telling Adam not to disturb her? My eyes opened to the rude awakening! Yes.... why oh why does these two people need to wake up at 6 o'clock in the morning on a Saturday?!

I have been sneezing my head off on Friday at work and had started to kind of lose my voice a little bit. Although my darling husband would be thankful as there will be a little bit more peace and less noise coming from me, he does not fancy having to be the one and only one to wake up for the two babies' night feeds. I cant help it. I need to swallow the flu tablet which made me drowsy, two tablets of paracetamol and one table of antibiotics. Medication makes me sleepy and drowsy, no matter what the dose! And I certainly have no plans to wake up for anything from night feeds to mid night snacks. I just want to sleep and I need the sleep.

I woke up with a jolt from the screamings of these two babies! It's only morning and they are at each others throat! I was not sure what was it that made Balqis really mad at Adam. Something Adam grab from her hands or something like that. And of course, Adam being Adam who needs to have everything Balqis has, had to retaliate when Balqis grab the stuff from his hands again. By this time, the episode seemed to be turning into a more dramatic scene. Adam was so sad about the whole thing, he buried his head onto my chest and cried crocodile tears. While Balqis continued watching her TV looking unperturbed, she glared at Adam and showed him that she had what he wanted in her hands. Adam sobbed.

Although I have no intentions of getting up from bed until next week or the week after, I had no choice because the decision was made that Mommy must wake up to solve this very urgent matter. My vision was not that clear but it looked like something blue that they were after. And oh it has buttons. It looked like my hand phone... it looked a lot like my hand phone... because IT IS MY HAND PHONE!!!

Thus, my Saturday began today with all these excitements going all around me! Both Balqis Putry and Adam Faris Putra did not nap at all the whole day and I spent most of my time, well... all of my time saying ... 'no Adam, no Balqis, dont do that Adam and dont do that Balqis'. And oh ... also... a lot of times saying ... 'Please help me Balqis and Adam' ... 'Please listen to me ...'.

Both went to sleep by 8.00pm tonight leaving me with some peace at last. Now, step aside and dont anybody touch my favorite spot infront of the TV. I am sick, I am having fever, flu and a throbbing head. My throat hurts beyond words. I dont want to argue with anybody and I cant becoz I dont have the voice anymore to do so.

The first time tonight I managed to watch Akademi Fantasia from the beginning without any disturbance. Yeah ....








signing off..Hazelinesnow at 11:29 PM [ | ]

{Takes all sorts to make the world .. the world..}



Sunday, August 01, 2004



Although we didnt go out much this weekend, it was a busy weekend nevertheless. Probably need another weekend to recover from this one. It never fail to amaze me as to where children find their energy. Today, both Balqis & Adam did not even nap during the day! Well Adam did for like 30 minutes. Yesterday was the same. But both went to bed very early tonight. And yesterday too. So that kind of supposed to help but then by the time both of them are tucked up fast asleep, it's my time to be really sleepy too! Shucks! I thought of doing up some work I'd brought home to complete over the weekend. I didnt managed to do anything at all last night because I was just nodding off at the keyboard. Tonight I was a bit better. Must be the Jamu. Although I didnt finish the lot but I managed to make a head way to one very important proposal -- in between jumping up and running to both Balqis & Adam. I imagined that both must be very very tired, grumpy and cranky. My mom always told me that when kids are too tired either they sleep motionless or they tend to cry and get up uncomfortably during the night! Tonight's the latter!

Balqis's speech is forming up beautifully. Balqis started to really know how to speak at the age of a little bit over 2 years old. We were very concerned and worried over the fact that she was not able to speak properly yet at that time. Somebody pointed out to me that Balqis will be speaking a little bit later due to the fact that she was picking up dual language as opposed to kids who only speaks one language. Not sure whether that's just myth or otherwise. But I noticed that her speech improves tremendously when I started to send her to the playschool/day care.

Adam now is going to be 20 months old. He cant speak yet but he tends to catch up on the tails of each words spoken by us. Today, he pointed outside and said 'there'. So my darling husband took them both out to ride their bicyles. I could see them from the window. I noted that my darling husband stood rooted watching them going around him. 15 minutes passed by and I noted that he moved about 0.5mm away from his earlier position. I made a conclusion that there is a difference in the way mommies look after their kids outside the house as opposed to daddies. They tend to just stand rooted while watching the kids. We mothers tend to tailgate the kids as much as possible in the hope that we could catch them, dive down or do something to shield them from falling! Daddies tend to just want to use as little muscle as possible -- in this case, using the eyeballs muscles will be just enough unless absolutely necessary to chase, follow or tailgate them. I am not sure whether this is true but it certainly is in my household!

Okay -- Balqis is up crying. Big cry. I wonder what is the matter. My darling husband is losing patient. Sometimes, all she wants is to be put on the old rocker that she'd outgrew but the chaos she created tend to get on my darling husband's nerves.... especially if she's not telling what is wrong or what is it that she wants.

Now, please excuse me while I save the world.





signing off..Hazelinesnow at 11:37 PM [ | ]

{Takes all sorts to make the world .. the world..}